I'm sure you've heard the story over and over again from some of your girlfriends - everything is going well with some nice guy in their lives, then suddenly everything turns upside-down when she starts being honest about her feelings. The guy suddenly starts drifting out of their relationship, and despite her sincerest efforts, there's nothing she could do to get him back. And here we were, thinking that honesty was the best policy. And it took so much just to lay out all the cards in front of him, too. What's going on? The truth is, men get the heebie-jeebies when women decide to take their relationship into the next level. Any well-meaning, honest moves you make won't work - they'll only make things worse.
Here are the ten things that you must do if you want to ensure that your man gets more serious about committing his heart and soul to you: 1. Do not rush him into a serious relationship with you. The more you push, the more he will pull away. 2. No matter how much you may love spending time with your man, plan a little away from him every now and then. Having this separation can give him time to realize how important you are. Remember that old saying, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder". 3. Leave small reminders of yourself around his house. Do not go over board and leave so much of your stuff at his house that he start feeling like you are trying to force your way into his house without his permission.
Each and every time we break up our idea of a "soul mate" dies just a little. When we fall in love, we are convinced that we have found our one and only partner. However, when we break up, rather than admitting that we were mistaken about the identity of that person being our one and true love, it is easier to accept that such things are a myth. Also, if we are the person who was dumped, it is easier not to believe in them than to accept the fact that we were dumped by our possible soul mate! The energy, time, and money we need to find a soul mate are enormous. Most of us do not have those resources to find them. Rather, we will tend to lower our standards and compromise on the best person we can find: "Mr/Mrs Right Now" rather than "Mr/Mrs Right".
TeamWork The definition of Teamwork according to WikiPedia is the concept of people working together cooperatively. "The key elements in the art of working together are how to deal with change, how to deal with conflict, and how to reach our potential... the needs of the team are best met when we meet the needs of individuals persons." (Max DePree) Every relationship requires teamwork in order to overcome all of the hurdles the relationship will come up against. The adage you are either with me or against me holds true. Although two people in a relationship will never wholly and completely agree on everything, It's important to be on the same page for the important things, for example, raising children, finances, & religious beliefs.
Today is women's day. I can tell you an important lesson I have learned in life. It's about breaking free from stereotypes. Life is one long journey. The milestones involve keeping together various relationships we forge along the way. Have you ever thought about how difficult it is to keep relationships together? What does it take from you to keep your loved ones inside your circle. I have learned my lessons from my elders and the next generation. The big lesson is adjustment. Most women around me, have forgotten how to adjust. I grew up in a close-knit large family. There were uncles and aunts of all description. One of my uncles played a dominant role in my life.
It took me two divorces to learn to fight fair and not shut down and push love away. I now have a wonderful loving relationship and celebrated my seventeenth anniversary on Valentine's Day. Follow tools that took me over forty years to acquire-and recapture your passion, romance, and love. What do you do when you feel hurt and your mate is pushing your buttons? I learned to shut down and go into my cave. John Gray's best seller Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus says that this is the man's role, but I found myself in my cave before I knew I had reacted. This is not a healthy way to deal with conflict and it won't get you the love you want. These three steps empower you to heat up your bedroom and recapture passion, and romance.
Having personally suffered from severe commitment phobia for many years, I know that being in love with someone who is afraid of commitment is not fun at all, but does someone's fear of commitment always have to be the end of a relationship? In real life, some people are not really meant to be together, and sometimes when you've tried everything humanly possible -- and I mean really tried everything including asking for divine intervention -- and failed, it's smart to know when to walk away. Walking away does not necessarily mean you will be able to stop loving that person because if you really love someone from your heart and soul you will never stop loving that person.
No matter how young at heart you are, as you mature you will eventually long for a longer term relationship. Long term relationships means that you now have accepted the responsibility to stay monogamous. There is no more fooling around with other women and being on the look out for another woman, especially if you are with her. However, being monogamous does not mean that you have lost your freedom. Freedom is in the mind. But if you feel that you have lost your freedom, you need to question if it is your woman who is the insecure one and constantly needs the re-assurance and requirement that you to be there 24/7 OR indeed you are not ready for being one hearted.
Commitment is an extraordinary force in people's lives - It has the power to overcome thoughts, emotions, moods and habits - virtually anything that we use to stop ourselves from doing anything. And there are commitment-phobes, not only in relationships, but in any area of our lives. The power is clear. A good friend of min has an ailing father with advance Alzheimer's and Dementia. And he visits him every week, despite everything. And he often doesn't want to - has every excuse. Only his commitment keeps him going. So a useful question is, "What stops commitment?" One possible answer is Vulnerability. Every time we commit - to anything, we increase the chances of being wounded, of losing, of failing.
One of the five "C's" of relationships is commitment and without it, you do not have a relationship, in fact any long-term relationship without it, is doomed, as it was never meant to be. But what happens when you are totally committed body and soul, and your chosen partner is not quite there yet? Well, it should come as no surprise to you that commitment from another cannot be forced. "Those convinced against their will, are of the same opinion still" or someone once said. If your partner, lover or companion is not committed you will be able to tell and it can become an emotional roller coaster to give without receiving that same level of commitment.