Have you ever noticed how your partner's judgments about you say more about him than they do about you? Yet, he stands behind these judgments as though they are a certified list of your defects. "You are a lousy housekeeper, because you don't fold the laundry 'correctly', " he declares. "You're a pig because of the way you keep your car (or better yet, don't keep up your car), " he insists. Or, how about this one: "You are a spoiled brat because you have the safety net of your family's wealth, " he whines. Now as an outsider looking in, at first glance, you could think he's actually talking about you. And even in your reality, his observations could be accurate.
The more someone tells me to stuff my emotions, the more I want to let them out. I've noticed the same in others. When a person is trying to tell his side of a story and everyone around him is telling him to calm down or tries to interrupt him with their own opinions on the subject, a bunch of unfinished thoughts pile up and it's almost impossible for him to get beyond what it is that brought him to this state. If you're feeling that sort of censoring or editorializing is happening to you, I say go ahead and have a spit spewin', snot flyin', let-it-all out kind of fit! Sometimes the more we try to measure our words, speak softly, or give off subtle hints instead of saying what we really want to say the more frustrated we become.
In your imagination, take a walking trip through a forest. As you approach a small village, you are struck by the beauty of the setting and feel a pull to stay here a while. As you enter the village, its leader walks toward you, greets you, and says: "Welcome to our village. We call it the Choice Community. Here you are encouraged to choose exactly how you would like to live, near people you feel a kinship toward or would enjoy learning from. "There are seven settlements. Each has room for neighbors and hospitality cottages for visitors. Feel free to visit any or all the settlements, then choose what fits for you. "Some people are relieved to find the tribe that matches their passions, interests, and ways of living, and they move in immediately.
Psst, did you know that sharing secrets in a relationship is a sure sign of love, trust and intimacy? Here's how to put the power of secrets to work for you. Sharing secrets defines a relationship as unique and cultivates a sense of "we-ness." In fact, keeping things just between the two of you helps you and your partner feel close and connected in ways that are meaningful to just the two of you--and that helps to cement a relationship. How to use secrets to add fun and romance to your relationship? * Celebrate special anniversaries. This can be anything--the day you met, the anniversary of your first date, or when you first kissed. The point is--and what makes it extra special--is that you don't tell anyone else what you're celebrating.
Relationships can be down, right messy at times, don't you agree? After all, as human beings created by God, we all have an innate desire, already programmed into our DNA for social interaction with other human beings. From your family relationships, to your many hopeful successful relationships. We all need and desire successful relationships, but what do you do, and what is your smart goals plan, when you find yourself or your once happy marriage on the losing end of a relationship that may be ending in dismal failures? 5 Key Points For Making Relationships Work Pray About me, I am a Christian believer in the Lord Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior, and firmly believe, that apart from God in your life, you are unable to live your life to it's fullest God given potential.
What do you and your partner fight about most? Money? Household chores? Not enough quality time together? Sure, these topics may be what you're arguing about at the moment--but in reality, they have nothing to do with the real conflict. IF YOU AND YOUR PARTNER TEND TO FIGHT ABOUT... *... Decisions-even small ones, such as who takes out the garbage and what movies to see, your hidden issue is: "My opinion doesn't matter." When one of you feels like the other's needs and wants are more important, that can easily lead to bickering. * Solve the hidden issue and stop the fighting: If you feel you don't get enough input, fess up. Chances are, if your partner is making most of the decisions, his intentions are noble.
Andrew has had a rough year. He lost his job, started a new job-- at a significant cut in pay, his brother was involved in a near-fatal accident and he's developed an ulcer. His sense of self worth has taken a steep nose dive. Andrew's wife tells him that she's here for him and that she wants to support him, but he continually tells her that he's fine and is handling it all. This isn't completely true. Inside, Andrew is falling apart. He is tense, exhausted and ill a lot of the time. He knows that he isn't being the kind of husband that he'd like to be. He also doesn't know how to get the kind of support that he secretly yearns for... without feeling like a big wimp.
I have learned that the more that I reduce drama in my life, the happier I am. Much of this has been by trial and error. What could be even more important is that I see how this reduction positively impacts all those around me. I used to be so self-absorbed that I was oblivious to what sort of ripple effect I was having on others. Last week I came out of the house to find that our wheels were stolen right off of our car! I tell you, it was a fantastic barometer for how I respond to outside circumstances. My first thought when I saw our car up on blocks was, "That is interesting! " Then I mused, "I am pretty sure that we didn't leave the car like that." This is a huge victory for me, a reformed drama-mama.
How healthy are YOUR relationships? If you are like most of us, without realizing it, you have often inadvertently created problems that could have been avoided. The acts and attitudes and behaviors that may seem natural, innocent and even harmless at the time, can sometimes lead to irreparable damage. Relationship sins are like that. They are sometimes subtle, surprising and difficult to understand the long term negative consequences. Are you guilty of committing any relationship sins, ever? Have your sins caused others to suffer irreparable emotional damage? Have you endured intense emotional upset because someone is blaming you? Do you feel guilty for having your own particular wants, needs and desires?
One of the key elements of relationships is communication and using it effectively to deal with stuff that comes up. This article will look at the importance of staying in the present as opposed to bringing up old stuff. Storing things up Many people somewhere along their up-bringing have learnt that certain things should not be said and have therefore practiced storing things up. In a relationship these might be tiny things at the beginning: the fact that your partner leaves the toilet seat up, that the wet towel is on the floor every day, that her dirty knickers are on the floor in the bedroom or that he didn't let you know that he'll be home late. These little trivial things might seem not important enough to be mentioned in the moment but they might build up over time.